Well, we have talked about it before. Colombia is a country that completely worships cheeses. Whether it be with guava paste, hot chocolate, fruit salad, or – heaven forbid! – hot dogs or sandwiches, nary an opportunity is lost to add a bit of fermented curd to the mix.
Well you might say, then, Gentle Reader, “so what? Cheese is amazing.” I will cede you that point, my confident cheese-o-phile, on most occasions.
There is, however, something I’m still not prepared to cede. At the very real risk of offending the many Colombians among you, I’m afraid my conscience demands that I admit something.
Colombian cheese often leaves me… well… kind of … meh.
There is nothing I love more than a good wine accompanied by a complicated and varied cheese board, replete with deliciously gooey camembert; tooth-hurtingly good brie; a brisk, sharp extra-tasty cheddar, almost too-intense blue vein; hell, even some Czechoslavakian sheep’s milk cheese would get me going. This is why it pains me to say, Gentle Cheese Lover, that, speaking very generally, I don’t find Colombian cheese very tasty.
Before I get booted out of my beloved adopted country for taking such an unpopular and unpatriotic stance, let me just say that I do like at least one type of cheese. This brings me to…
The Good
Paipa is one of those towns that helped me fall in love with Boyaca. There are many reasons for this, one being the local product that Paipa-ians are understandably proud of. Paipa cheese is made by masters of the cheese craft. It’s full-bodied, rich and sharp, and just becomes even more magic when heated. Whilst in the slightly chilly but warm-hearted Paipa, I had the best bueñolos I’ve ever had, so good, because they heavily featured this gloriously mature (keep it wrapped up in cloth in a cupboard, not in the fridge), flavourful cheese. Paipa, we salute you and your devotion to the Cheese Art. I’m told the otherworldly La Guajira is home to a variety of cheese rivalling Paipa’s for its right royal flavour kick, but I personally haven’t been lucky enough to try this claim out for myself. If anyone has any lying around, I’m more than happy to give it a go, though.
The Bad
Well, really, I’d struggle to find much Colombian cheese itself that has enough character to be definitively bad. We’ll discuss this more in the next category. However, there is something I’d say, from my perspective and with my gringo palate, is definitively bad – at least for me. And that is this Colombian obsession with combining sweet things with perfectly inoffensive cheese. Hear me out first: I think a perfect contrast on the aforementioned cheese plate would be strawberries, grapes, or even fig paste. Furthermore, I can handle the whole hot chocolate and cheese thing. I don’t understand it, but I’ll continue to do it. I even, for reasons beyond my own understanding, actually quite like the agua panela and cheese combo. However, I will not stand for the sacrilege of combining admittedly tasteless cheese with guava paste. Nor will I stomach it when anybody, friend or foe, takes a perfectly delicious Dutch Edam, and smothers it all in arequipe. There are some things that I just take exception to. Sorry, but that’s me!
The Meh
Well, it is in this category that I probably, sadly, part ways with a lot of my audience. Don’t hate me: it’s just my personal opinion. Costeño cheese sometimes gets a bit of flack for being a bit salty; but you know what? At least it registers on the palate. A lot of Colombian cheese has no taste. Nothing whatsoever. This is what honestly baffles me about the whole Cheese Obsession. I could understand it if the majority of the cheeses were delicious, but this is just not the case. Cheese, like the above Campesino, is often described appreciatively as smooth. Personally, I find this description to also just mean bland. Perhaps this is just me coming from a world of cheese that is a front-on assault on the taste buds, but I’m finding it very hard to change this.
What’s your opinion? Is “smooth” just a polite way of saying “boring,” or is Colombian cheese actually amazing, and deserved to be had with everything, even guava paste? I know this is a passionate topic, so please let us know your perspective below!
